Dear Avery,
2017 was painful, disheartening, sad, and down right the hardest year of my life. But it was also beautiful, full of love, and it’s when I began focusing on being present.
B a l a n c e.
When the flamingo started following me this summer (the “flamingo” post), I recently came across this image and said out loud: YES. There is more meaning behind my spirit animal.
Life isn’t about always being at the peak of happiness. It’s about knowing the valleys will come too, and it’s about how you handle both. In your valley, if you only wallow in self pity — chances are, you’ll stay there a long time. If you stay at your peak — but don’t appreciate the joy and the beauty of it — will you ever truly be present?
2017 was a year I decided what I needed for my life. Going through a divorce is gut-wrenching experience, and I don’t wish it upon anyone. Especially when your husband is such a fantastic man. He will always be one of the best people I know. But it stopped working for many reasons. I felt like a failure. I felt shame and guilt (and will probably always feel this). I came to point where I wasn’t present in a “perfect” marriage. I lost my joy, and ultimately decided to go through the trenches to get it back.
I’m working on finding my balance. Being OK with the hard, and fully enjoying the good.
Working for what I truly want in this life.
Figuring out what passionate love looks like to me, and how I need to give it back.
How to love myself despite my flaws and actions.
Learning to not be so hard on myself because that goes no where.
How to feel deeply and accept the circumstances for what they are.
How to show compassion and grace for all those in my life.
Working on finding stillness in the chaos.
Finding beauty in the flawed.
Owning my life choices because they are my own to make.
Finding my balance. My ying and yang. My inner flamingo.
And so Avery, I hope you find your balance when life gets good, when life gets hard, and when life is somewhere in the middle. Through it all, I’ll be here for you. With grace, compassion, empathy, and love as best as I possibly can. Because we all deserve that, even those of us who are currently off balance.
Into a new year we go.
With love,
Aunt Megs
With Love, Aunt Megs 
Awh, Megs. I am sorry to hear that 2017 was a *year*. I am in awe of your strength and appreciate your want to find your joy so immensely. You’re a fantastic woman and wish all the best for you. I hope 2018 is treating you well so far.