Dear Avery,
I’ve been on a mission for quite a few years now: in search of The Perfect White Tee. The perfect shirt that fits you just right, isn’t somehow the most see-through thing you own, a scoop or v-neck low enough to show off a great necklace but high enough not to bring focus to the busty ladies, AND is versatile — easy to dress it up or dress it down. My unicorn. Over the years, I’ve found variations of such a fantasy piece. So I’d buy each that came close. Ending up with 7 almost perfect white tees.
Hence how I end up with more STUFF than I actually need.
I recently jumped on the bandwagon of watching the Netflix show, Tidying Up with Marie Kondo. Her simple philosophy to tidying your space (and ultimately your life) is asking yourself,
“Does this spark joy?”
If yes, keep it. If no, thank it for it’s service and get rid of it. Simple as that.
Fun fact about me, I tend to give inanimate objects feelings. So while saying “thank you almost perfect white tee for your service” sounds a little nutty talking to a t-shirt, I totally get it. You are outwardly removing your emotional attachment to that piece, and letting that “thing” know you were grateful for its meaning to you.
When cleaning out your clothes closet, Kondo suggests putting E V E R Y T H I N G into a pile. Why? So you can fully appreciate the gravity of all that you actually have. It’s really easy to go piece by piece in your closet and say “yes” or “no” to each item. But it doesn’t give a true sense of the magnitude you are dealing with.
I decided to take on this challenge. Handful by handful the pile got larger and larger very quickly. I eventually sat down and took in the weight of it all. Suddenly, I notice two over-sized suitcases in the room. Oh dear god, please don’t let there be any more clothes in there. Sure enough both were filled to the brim. I emptied those out, put everything in the pile, and almost started crying. It was heavy. So I sat with it. Soaked up the weight of my material items. These things have gone through good, neutral, and hard times of my life with me. Some pieces carrying sentimental value, some that make me feel confident and good, some fitting more snug than I remember them being…
I began to draw parallels to the bigger pictures in my life. How even though some things or people stopped sparking joy in my life, I still kept hold of them (hoping they’d spark joy at another time in my life). When its perfectly fine to say, “thank you ______ for the role you played in my life at that time, but you no longer bring me joy. It’s time to move on.” It brings in layers of gratitude, peace, and acceptance in moving forward.
And while looking at this mountain of clothing that feels completely overwhelming to sift through, you start to acknowledge the journey you’ve gone through, and how the act of starting to confront it, piece by piece, is where your real path to growth and joy unfolds.
With love,
Aunt Megs
With Love, Aunt Megs 